Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Top Ten Signs You Won’t Win The New York City Marathon

I thought I was done pontificating on NYCM, but have people seen this video yet? If not, you have to watch it. It is too damn funny. Go ahead, I’ll wait…I know it takes a little while to buffer and there’s a 30 second commercial beforehand that’s kind of annoying, but it’s so worth it, trust me.
Anyway, my friend sent me a link to it this morning and I mistakenly watched it during lunch while drinking a can of Diet Coke. Right off the bat, #10 was so funny, I snarfed and had soda come right out of my nose. Suddenly all eyes were on me as I couldn’t stop myself from laughing hysterically. It was all sort of embarrassing, but I didn’t care. I hadn’t laughed so hard since grade school. Afterward, everyone was gathered around my office curious to know what had me giggling like a school girl. I declined to comment though, knowing that all of these non-runners would just never find it as funny as I did.
After the exhilaration, it was hard to concentrate on work for the rest of the day. Instead, I kept thinking of sights and sounds from my own running of NYCM that I could add to make Dave’s list more complete. Here’re my contributions:

10a. You trip on your own laces running to the start line. (Yeah, that’s me!)
9a. You “warm up” for the race by smoking a cigarette. (Saw this one up close!)
8a. After a blistering first mile, you find yourself right next to Katie Holmes.(For my aunts!)
7a. Instead of a bunch of guys speaking in languages you don’t understand, you’re being paced by this guy. (Thanks tkujimmylee for the photo!)
6a. You’ve been tapering since last year. (One friend’s excuse for not running!)
5a. You hit the top of the Verranzo and ask “Where’s the free food?” (Heard this one too!)
4a. Instead of this, your running mantra is “Please God, oh please, don’t let me walk at mile 21…” (Thanks again to tkujimmylee).
3a. You’ve hit the Wall before the race even starts.
2a. You carbo load by getting a Big Mac and fries…Supersized!
1a. You have pristine toenails. (Kind of lame…just like all of Dave’s No.1s)

Anyone else like to add to this list, please help yourself to the comments. As for me, I still can’t help smirking at Dave’s #10.


Non-Runner Nancy said...

As luck would have it and as I was positively sulking about my missed run in beautiful White Plains, this Dave came on as a re-run last night (in my hotel in Chicago). It did lift my spirits.

I finally made it here, the foliage was positively gorgeous from the air as you said. Then, my damn bag didn't arrive. :( Finally, precisely, at 12:23am, it showed up. My running clothes are laid out for the morning. FINALLY, LAMINATOR, I am going for a run in beautiful NY!! I feel like I am sharing it with you!!

mmtap said...

Great post and congratulations again. Funny coincidence, I ran alongside Tinker Bell at the Delaware marathon in May 2007. He may be goofy lookin' but he sets a good pace.

Topher said...

He had me at #10. I just came across your blog, and gotta tell you, I'm diggin' it!

HUGE THANKS for posting the London Marathon commercial. I found it on YouTube earlier this year by accident, and I haven't been able to find it since. It'll be making an appearance on my blog soon with a shout out to you.


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